It adds uncertainty to the mix.
The local barista has your coffee order down to a science (one pump of vanilla, a splash of oat milk, light ice), and you’ve finally perfected your nightly skin-care routine (double cleanse, serums, extra moisturizer). But, when it comes to how, exactly, you find pleasure in the bedroom? *Awkwardly stares into space while crickets chirp*
While it might be taboo in some circles to get into the specifics of your sex life, it’s a vital element of your overall health and well-being. “Most of us are not taught that pleasure is healthy and should be a part of our everyday lives,” says Rebecca Alvarez Story, sexologist and founder of Bloomi—a Latina-owned wellness destination offering sexual health essentials and education. “[But] our sexuality is such an essential part of our life that it deserves healthy conversations and attention.”
According to Story, both the body and mind benefit from just five minutes of pleasure per day, whether that’s listening to a song you love, eating a delicious dessert, or enjoying skin-to-skin contact. Helping people tap into the benefits of sexual pleasures is what inspired her and the Bloomi team to develop “pleasure profiles”—because the more you understand about your personal pleasure preferences, the better you can celebrate and enjoy them, she says.
“A pleasure profile is the manner in which we savor pleasure during intimate moments,” Story says. “Human sexuality is fluid, and we have ever-evolving desires that ebb and flow throughout life. Understanding ourselves in the present moment helps us tune into our bodies.”
And when you’re more in tune with your body, not only are you more likely to feel comfortable advocating for your sexual needs, but also exploring what brings you pleasure beyond the four walls of your bedroom. “It allows you to have an outlet for your needs and practice communication,” Story says.
Her recommendation for finding your pleasure profile? Read through the six most common options below, then take some time to reflect on which ones resonate with you by journaling and/or talking with a trusted friend or partner. Soon, your pleasure profile will be as familiar to you (and as blissfully delicious) as your go-to latte order.
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If you’re someone who values the importance of slowness, over-communication, trust, and vulnerability, or even someone who falls on the asexuality spectrum, you might fit into the Mindful profile. It takes time to build trust, so Story recommends slow-building activities such as massages and non-penetrative sexual acts. Those same recommendations hold true for non-partnered sex, which is why she suggests leaning into your pleasure profile with the Bloomi Massage Waterproof and Rechargeable Vibrator for a sensual massage moment.
“With its unique shape that has both a curvy side and a rounded side and its flexibility, [the] Bloomi Massage allows for massaging greater areas or targeted stimulation,” Story adds.
According to Story, you fit into the Playful profile if you find joy in keeping things light and flirty, exploring various roles in the bedroom, and maybe even dressing up during intimate times. “Open-mindedness and a willingness to try new things together are some of your key characteristics,” Story says.
“Consider incorporating activities such as role play, and versatile toys like a ‘bullet vibe’ size toy, such as the Bloomi Play Waterproof Mini Vibrator for full genital exploration sessions, as well as the perfect size for strap-ons.” Talk about tiny but mighty.
If you’re more into savoring the arousal build-up and experimenting with all your senses during intimacy, Story says you most likely fall into the Sensory category. This profile suits those who deeply enjoy the entire sexual experience and are pretty in-tune with their body and surroundings.
Tap into your senses by experimenting with scent, taste, textures, and temperatures during your next intimate encounter. And to enhance and round out your experience, opt for the Essentials Bundle—which includes eight, clean sexual health products, ranging from oils and cleansers to double-sided and mini vibrators. It’s essentially your Mary Poppins bag of sexual wellness.
Similar to the Playful and Sensory profiles, under the Kinky category, you’re open to trying nearly anything. “Novelty and adventure arouse you, and you’re open to trying temperature play, restraints, and more,” Story says. “Engaging all erogenous zones and different positions excites you.”
For a toy that can keep up with your adventurous spirit and help you explore new avenues of pleasure, Story recommends the Indulge Double Sided Vibrator. “This flexible vibrator can be used vaginally or anally and is designed for G-spot and P-spot pleasure,” Story adds.
If intimacy is a way for you to unwind and connect more emotionally with your partner, you may fall under the Relaxing pleasure profile. And the best way to chill out? Giving each other massages, of course.
Up the tranquility (and sensual!) factor of your next night in with the Massage Clitoral and Body Vibrator that fits perfectly in the palm of your hand and is ideal for body massages—with a curvy side for targeted stimulation, too.
You love to tease, flirt, and really savor the sexual tension, huh? Well, you might just be the Passionate pleasure profile. According to Story, you probably prefer skin-to-skin contact and switching up positions.
The perfect add-in to any night of fun—no matter what you have planned—is Bloomi Smooth, a pH-balanced, water-based lube that not only keeps sensations smooth and comfy throughout your entire experience, but also enhances all your most-favorite parts (which is kind of the whole point of feeling pleasure, after all).